
Losses
Written By: Nancy Ruiz-Barnes, LCSW
Recently we have been hearing more in social media about losses in pregnancy. This is always a very difficult topic that women and their partners have difficult time talking about. Most women who encountered a loss have explained that they feel ashamed, disappointed due to making an announcement (to friends and/or family), and heart broken. Pregnancy is something that is really considered to be a miracle. The reason behind being a miracle is because there is nothing and nor anyone that can assure us that we will have a baby. Science is advance, but cannot sometimes let us know why we encounter losses in pregnancy.
Most women have a difficult time to talk about a loss as they feel they are the ones to blame. Women need to be aware that for the most part we are not at fault, things happen for a reason that doctors are not able to explain. As a therapist, I have encountered clients most of the time feeling that they did something wrong and that they are to blame. I always let clients know as they are processing the loss that they are not to be blame, most of the time these losses are unexplainable and do not particularly point out to something that women are doing wrong. There are many women who go through losses that we don’t hear about until sometimes we share our own story. It is okay to also mourn the loss of your baby, regardless what stage in the pregnancy you were. Especially, because at one point we knew that the baby was going to part of our family. This is the time to express feelings and thoughts about the loss to love ones to also have the support the you need and to grief the loss.
If you have experienced a loss sometimes you may not feel comfortable processing the loss with family or partner, you may want to reach out to a therapist as an option. A therapist can hear what you are going through and empathized with the feelings and thoughts that you may be experiencing. Going to see a therapist for a loss is sometimes necessary for some and possibly during the pregnancy. The reason behind seeing a therapist one can better manage the possible anxiety when trying for the next pregnancy or while being pregnant.
Written By: Nancy Ruiz-Barnes, LCSW